Values: Reflected Through Reflection
Oddly enough during quarantine I’d been pushing myself away from the things I usually do
to cope or I find comforting. Instead there has been this push to smash everything together
and drown out the uncomfortable with the discomfort of ignoring what was truly going on inside.
I thought that I was comfortable with slow and mundane, but once a heavy break was put on the
continuous go go of the everyday, it started to unknowingly break me. Yes, there were the much
needed breakdowns that collapsed me out of this behavior but what really broke me out of this
self deprecating cycle was the connections around me. My family, this class, maintaining relationships
with the people I couldn’t see day to day, they all taught me how to cope little by little. First my mother
and the extra time we took in this class to talk on Wednesday taught me that it’s okay to express my
feelings because everyone is suffering in someway or another during this time and most are all going
a little crazy. Second, in taking time to step back and reflect on experiences there was a further
understanding not only of myself but also of the people around me. It awoke me to things and people
outside of myself as well as within myself. To truly connect, to find vibrancy, compassion,
wellbeing, identity, all the things we wanted to encompass in this project there needs to be a small
step back, a reflection. One will never notice what they are grateful for if they never take the time
to look back on it. One can never find wellbeing if no time is taken to wallow in silence and hear
the inner thoughts. So through my section of the project I wanted to share the importance that reflection,
quiet time, and taking things slow can do, not just to promote wellbeing, but also the rest of the values
we wanted to collect and share.
Below is a small collection of things, ideas, art that lead me to reflection, comfort,
and sometimes even discomfort. All these feelings are important on the journey.
and drown out the uncomfortable with the discomfort of ignoring what was truly going on inside.
I thought that I was comfortable with slow and mundane, but once a heavy break was put on the
continuous go go of the everyday, it started to unknowingly break me. Yes, there were the much
needed breakdowns that collapsed me out of this behavior but what really broke me out of this
self deprecating cycle was the connections around me. My family, this class, maintaining relationships
with the people I couldn’t see day to day, they all taught me how to cope little by little. First my mother
and the extra time we took in this class to talk on Wednesday taught me that it’s okay to express my
feelings because everyone is suffering in someway or another during this time and most are all going
a little crazy. Second, in taking time to step back and reflect on experiences there was a further
understanding not only of myself but also of the people around me. It awoke me to things and people
outside of myself as well as within myself. To truly connect, to find vibrancy, compassion,
wellbeing, identity, all the things we wanted to encompass in this project there needs to be a small
step back, a reflection. One will never notice what they are grateful for if they never take the time
to look back on it. One can never find wellbeing if no time is taken to wallow in silence and hear
the inner thoughts. So through my section of the project I wanted to share the importance that reflection,
quiet time, and taking things slow can do, not just to promote wellbeing, but also the rest of the values
we wanted to collect and share.
Below is a small collection of things, ideas, art that lead me to reflection, comfort,
and sometimes even discomfort. All these feelings are important on the journey.
Reflection/Connection Through Music I wanted to share a few songs that I always find myself returning to but also have been really comforting
to me during the quarantine.
to me during the quarantine.
- MYK & Shirosky feat. Manifest - Picasso
- They have a full album called Adaptation and honestly, there is not one song that I don’t love
- on the album. ( https://youtu.be/oWGuHIPRnfY )
- Breathe - Lee Hi ( https://youtu.be/5iSlfF8TQ9k ) This song is not in English, but the translation to the lyrics are beautiful and poignant despite being simple.
[Verse 1]
Take a deep breath
Until both sides of your heart get numb
Until it hurts a little
Let out your breath even more
Until you feel
Like there’s nothing left inside
It’s alright if you run out of breath
No one will blame you
It’s okay to make mistakes sometimes
Because anyone can do so
Although comforting by saying it’s alright
Are just words
[Chorus]
Someone’s breath. That heavy breath
How can I see through that?
Though I can’t understand your breath
It’s alright I’ll hold you
[Verse 2]
It’s alright if you run out of breath
No one will blame you
It’s okay to make mistakes sometimes
Because anyone can do so
Although comforting by saying it’s alright
Are just words
[Chorus]
Someone’s breath. That heavy breath
How can I see through that?
Though I can’t understand your breath
It’s alright I’ll hold you
[Verse 3]
Even if others think your sigh
Takes out energy and strength
I already know
That you had a day that’s hard enough
To let out even a small sigh
Now don’t think of anything else
Let out a deep sigh
Just let it out like that
[Outro]
Someone’s breath. That heavy breath
How can I see through that?
Though I can’t understand your breath
It’s alright I’ll hold you
You really did a good job
Reflection/Connection with Art
Portrait of a Freedom Fighter by Julian Schnabel
I had the privilege one year to go to the Toledo Art Museum and this art piece is one that really affected
me. The moment I walked into the room with the piece I remember the slight chuckle of someone
walking by because while entering the room, I audibly gasped. There is something so encompassing
about being in its presence that for some reason tears sprang to my eyes and a well of emotions overtook
me. I have always had a predilection for the ephemeral side of art but I had never seen that reflected
through a visual art. I think what made the reaction so strong was that this work of art, I don’t know how,
managed to accomplish that element. Every time I look at a picture of the work it feels so lackluster, but
the memory attached to my physical encounter with it is so strong that it is hard for me to deny the
power of the work. There is a presence, no matter how many pictures I may show you of the piece, that
can not be replicated through photography or recreations and I think it is that phenomenon which truly
makes this work of art brilliantly breathtaking.
me. The moment I walked into the room with the piece I remember the slight chuckle of someone
walking by because while entering the room, I audibly gasped. There is something so encompassing
about being in its presence that for some reason tears sprang to my eyes and a well of emotions overtook
me. I have always had a predilection for the ephemeral side of art but I had never seen that reflected
through a visual art. I think what made the reaction so strong was that this work of art, I don’t know how,
managed to accomplish that element. Every time I look at a picture of the work it feels so lackluster, but
the memory attached to my physical encounter with it is so strong that it is hard for me to deny the
power of the work. There is a presence, no matter how many pictures I may show you of the piece, that
can not be replicated through photography or recreations and I think it is that phenomenon which truly
makes this work of art brilliantly breathtaking.
Eiko and Koma -Wallow
https://vimeo.com/9690716 this is the link to the performance.
I will give a heads up that their style of movement is a bit of an acquired taste but I think they prove
the beauty of just being in the moment. They are known for their slow movement and utilization
of Butoh elements to create their own style. They have strong awareness and connection with each
other in their movement but also a strong interdependence with the space. Their connectivity with
their environment adds to the often ecologically charged messages. They also speak to the message
that technique boils down to more than what is shown in mainstream movements such as ballet, tap,
jazz, and modern. They are an inspiration for me to look beyond what I see at first.
the beauty of just being in the moment. They are known for their slow movement and utilization
of Butoh elements to create their own style. They have strong awareness and connection with each
other in their movement but also a strong interdependence with the space. Their connectivity with
their environment adds to the often ecologically charged messages. They also speak to the message
that technique boils down to more than what is shown in mainstream movements such as ballet, tap,
jazz, and modern. They are an inspiration for me to look beyond what I see at first.
Reflection/Connection through Space and Place
Our current situation has been teaching me about the importance of slowing down and
being grateful for the small details. This led me to return to some of my old stomping grounds
as a child, reminiscing on memories and habits that unfolded in the spaces.
being grateful for the small details. This led me to return to some of my old stomping grounds
as a child, reminiscing on memories and habits that unfolded in the spaces.
Everything in our backyard is exposed to the watchful eye of someone peeping out a window or
door in the side of our house, but this place is a small corner where not even the next door
neighbor could visibly see you. Nestled behind an extra garage that the previous owners built
to store supplies for the now non-existent pool, the calming embrace of the foliage and shrubbery
create a mystical space that fed the soul and imagination of the young who ran through and
settled there. Memories of siblings and friends congregating behind to hide or create the latest
make believe, dreaming up stories and new ideas, the tools of nature surrounding guided the
game of the day or the much needed quiet reflection. Returning here now it has the same
soothing effect that seeks to settle my brain which seems to constantly run at speeds far
exceeding my ability to communicate. The space is centering. It allows for me to draw back for
a second (or hour) re-piecing myself back together in order to better exist with my fellow beings.
This space provides a place to silently overthink things and then let go of that tension. The wind
whispers you need not hold on, the trees listen though you may not speak out loud. The
association with the space gives it a life of its own and provides a much needed “quiet” that
swirls with the thoughts in the wind.
So where is that space of “quiet” serenity for you? Are you the type of person who needs these
door in the side of our house, but this place is a small corner where not even the next door
neighbor could visibly see you. Nestled behind an extra garage that the previous owners built
to store supplies for the now non-existent pool, the calming embrace of the foliage and shrubbery
create a mystical space that fed the soul and imagination of the young who ran through and
settled there. Memories of siblings and friends congregating behind to hide or create the latest
make believe, dreaming up stories and new ideas, the tools of nature surrounding guided the
game of the day or the much needed quiet reflection. Returning here now it has the same
soothing effect that seeks to settle my brain which seems to constantly run at speeds far
exceeding my ability to communicate. The space is centering. It allows for me to draw back for
a second (or hour) re-piecing myself back together in order to better exist with my fellow beings.
This space provides a place to silently overthink things and then let go of that tension. The wind
whispers you need not hold on, the trees listen though you may not speak out loud. The
association with the space gives it a life of its own and provides a much needed “quiet” that
swirls with the thoughts in the wind.
So where is that space of “quiet” serenity for you? Are you the type of person who needs these
kinds of spaces and moments?
Olivia, thank you for the honesty in expressing how this Quarantine has affected you. I mirror many of your same sentiments. I like how you also state that coping is an ongoing process. I find myself to be discouraged a lot of the time as I believe I am simply unequipped to deal with the situation at hand. Your words provide me with great reassurance during these stressful times.
ReplyDeleteYour connection and appreciation of art is also incredibly admirable to me. The way you were able to go in-depth with examples from multiple mediums is truly exceptional.
Thank you for the great times and connections throughout this semester! I look forward to spending much more time with you in the future! When we return, I will definitely see you in the commuter lounge! :)